What is up internet queers. I wrote this on a bad ass harley davidson
memo pad I bought at Honk's Family $1 and forced my fourth wife Cindy
Sue to type it onto the gay internet. I am here to tell you about why
your G.I. Joe men are gay, but first let me tell you about something
else.
When naming your son (don't have a daughter they are worthless sluts)
name him with at least the same first initial as you. That way further
on in time if you happen to forge some gun papers and traces point to
D. Verburg you can just BLAME YOUR INTERNET QUEER SON WHO IS IN JAIL
AS WE SPEAK. Take it from me, D. Verburg... but not the queer washout
D. Verburg you're used to!
So anyways I was pretty fucking upset when I saw my no good son's
fucking internet page about plastic army toys. Let me tell you that is
a queer hobby that hardly qualifies as a hobby. When I was a kid, I
had the Real Ass G.I. Joe doll but I outgrew it when my daddy gave me
a gun. I used that gun to bust up seventeen liquor joints by the time
I was 13. Bustin' up liquor joints, now that is a hobby. Shootin at
the engine block of a rented Corsica is also a hobby. Plastic army
fags are not a hobby for men.
My boy might be able to grow a good mustache just like his old man,
but he owns more '21st Century Anniversary Tea Party Swivel Arm
Dukes' than he owns rifles and that shit makes me angrier than a
Grizzly Bear on No-Salmon week in the Tetons. How are you gonna bust
up a liquor joint using a little army man that can't even move his
arms 90 degrees!! How are you gonna hotwire a trans am with a Laser
Rifle Trooper? Shit is queer, queer, queer.
Sure I like some cartoons. Only one actually. It's called Lord of the
Rings and maybe you've fucking heard of it. It's about Real Ass shit,
not Pollocks drivin little tanks. It deals with real issues, like
Mordor. Gandalf the Grey was bustin up liquor joints with his buddy
Sauromon when those queer elves were collectin' plastic army toys made
for Jews and children.
I'd tell you internet queers to reconsider your lives, but it's too
fucking late. If you need me I'll be shooting Coors Light Cold
Activated Bottles with my .22 over at Bernie's trailer. If we're real
lucky, we might hit the neighbor's cat and they might invite us over
for tuna loaf!
6 comments:
I'm glad you have some kind of relationship with your dad now, at least
_o my god. that was great. fucking great.
Plastic army
fags are not a hobby for men.
well said, pops verburg...well said.
Hey, D. Verburg's Dad. Long time, no talk. How are the kids from your other marriages D.(esiree) Verburg, D.(ee) Verburg, and D.(io) Thorton-Verburg?
Worthless sluts are only worthless to their fathers.
To the rest of us, they are the best we can do.
Dear D. Verburg's father, thank you for the informative way of naming children. I wish I had known those uses before I had to do stairwell pushings
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